An Apology

Dear blog world

I've not broken up with oyou, and you've not done anything to upset me.  This really has been a case "its not you, its me"...

:o)

I've not forgotten about my little blog here, in fact I've been feeling guilty for not updating as regular as I'd like.  But those who know me know why I've been preoccupied.  

This blog is not a blog about anything other than my quest to conquer Kilimanjaro, and I'm more determined than ever to do it in light of recent events.   Everything with me is fine, that I can promise you.  I'm stronger than I thought and I'm seeing this through.

When I'm able to I'll blog about whats been going on the past couple of weeks, most of it good - but right now everything has to be kept quiet :o)  The walls have ears...

I'll try to keep you updated more often, I promise.

Love

Kmac xxx

No longer a 10k virgin

Date :  3rd May
Weather:  Bright and sunny, but a bit chilly
Footwear:  Cute wee black ballet pumps

Morning bloggies!! 

If Carlsberg did weekends....    I tell you, what a weeked I've had.

All last week I was tied up with Jesus Christ Superstar rehearsals, dress rehearsals, tech  rehearsals and on Thursday night we opened.  We opened after 12 weeks of long rehearsals, lost voices, missing Apostles, costume issues with my pants (loong story)... to be part of the show was something really special and quite often you'll hear people talk about "post show blues" and its so true.  You spend so much time together with your fellow cast mates, and you see each other when you are hyper, shattered, ratty or ill that you become family and for show week you spend more time in a dressing room than you do in bed.  But its all worth it.  What we managed to put on last week was a spectacular show and I've not heard one bad review or comment about it.  So well done JC cast and crew - heres to working with you all again soon.

Some highlights of show week for you all (apologies if they make little to no sense... some of you will know what I'm on about)

" Oh my fucking god"
"Herods dancers, bigger pants please.  The guys in the fly tower dont know where to look"
"Good evening Jews, Romans, assorted Judeans and Herods Whores, this is your 5min act 1 beginners call"
"Welcome to the Alhambra Fm, and if your name is Clarke this one is for you.  Act 1 beginners to stage"
Anything that came out of Kate Haley's scarcastic Irish mouth - That girl is compedy gold!
"Why wouldnt we find you attractive Vicki, you wear anal beads as accessories"
"See my purse.... its empty"  ( When Ed forgot his line of "See my purse I'm a poor poor man"  how anyone can forget a line halfway into it..!)

So many memories and the photos are just coming back to haunt us all on facebook....! No detagging now...


Now onto my race recap.

Yesterday marked the day that I would run my first ever 10k, and those of you the know me know that recently I was regretting the decision to do that.  However, after the show on Sat night I went home, got an early night (didn't even watch 24!) and got up at 8am to start my race prep.  Rob stayed in bed, knowing that hes going to be standing around Holyrood park for the best part of an hour wasn't really a motivator for  him to get up early. 

I had arranged to meet Mrs Fudge and Mr Fudge at 10am at the Scottish Parliment, then we all headed into the main area for teh start of the warm up.  Mrs Fudge and I looted the Eat Natural stand and also the Powerade stand before the race, leaving the boys to carry our stash for the rest of the day.  If we are gonna run 10k they can carry our refuel for later.

Fudgey and I has said from the start we would start together and meet at the end, but we'd be running independantly of each other because we both pace differently, and we are both really selfish runners!  Normally we chat all the time, but when we are running there is no chat at all.

The first 5k went by perfectly for me, I was timing myself using the highly complex method of Ipod song lengths.  Usually 5k for me takes me to track 7 on my ipod, but yesterday I hit the 5k mark by song 5/start of song 6 so approx 27 mins.  A new PB.

Then I started to feel slightly unwell.... and decided the best course of action would be to throw up at the 6km marker. 

This slowed me up and for the next 2 k I alternated between walking and power walking and light jogging. 

Then I saw the 9k marker in the distance and decided to go for it, wasn't fun and my body was telling to stop, there were even a few tears because I was starting to think I couldn't do it.

Then somehow the next thing I knew I was crossing the finish line.

I'm going to be honest, this was not the most fun I'd had running and I wasn't at my best.  I was shattered from a busy show week and other bits and pieces, but to hear that Rob and Mr Fudgey thought my time was around the 65min mark really perked me up.  Then Mrs Fudgey sent me a text about 2 hours after the race to tell me...

My first ever 10k race time was 64mins and 53 seconds. 

I was totally over joyed and wanted to do it all again.  Until I got to Robs, felt sick and threw up again.

Moral of the story here kids, never run a 10k after 4 nights of JCS and never eat the cherry flavoured energy bar (designed to be eaten during excercise) after excercise - It'll make you feel great for about 20 mins then you'll feel super sick.

Today I feel great, knees are a bit stiff but thats to be expected.

Next stop Kilimanjaro!

Kmac xxx

I survived!

Morning blog world!

I'm back and fiting fit (ish) after my weekend full of hen party fun, singing, dancing, hot tubing and then rehearsals on Sunday.  I totally lost my voice on Sunday night and just getting it back now but a small price to pay for what was a wonderful weekend!

As promised, I manged to sneek in 2 cheeky runs while I was away.  My run on Friday morning was glorious, it was a lovely day in Edinburgh and I decided to step up to my fear of running outside and I took to the pavements for a quick 40mins around HolyRood park.

Saturday morning around the lake and golf club at the lodge resort we were at for the hen weekend provided the location for the run.  A lovely 30 mins around the lake (avoiding the angry swans and ducks that chased you) and up over the hill back to the log cabin.

I spent the weekend with some of my closest friends and one of the biggest moments for me was when one of them commented on how good I looked.  She hadnt seen me since Oct/Nov last year and said she saw a difference in me and thought I looked great!  Its always nice to hear things like that about you, but when you know the person really really means it its even better :o).

I wont go into the full hen weekend goings on (mainly because the walls have ears) but what I will tell you is that bubbly, hot tubs and WII Kareoke mix really really well and a lime and ginger salt exfoliation with a massage the next day is a fantastic hangover cure.   We had a good selection of food for both nights, we brought our own so lots of healthy options like vegetable sticks and corn on the cob and salads, however I think my attraction to Sailor Jerry rum undid all my good work.   Never mind, your best friend only gets married once right!

Hit the gym yesterday morning, not feeling 100% I decided to work on my upper body but soon realised that even that was too much, so I hopped onto the X trainer for 20 mins of moderate excercise on that.  Better than nothing I figure!! 

Today I'm resting, back to the gym tomorrow for a long run.  I'm planning to reach 9k or even go the full 10k depending on time.  Its 2 weeks until the Bupa 10k in Edinburgh and I'm getting nervous that I've never ran that distance before and I'm starting to feel me put pressure on myself to get a good time.  I need to keep reminding myself that this is a training run for Kilimanjaro and that times don't matter.  But if I take longer than 75mins to do it I'll be gutted. 

Hope the volcanic ash isn't disrupting too many of you - my thoughts go out to all the families spread out all ove rhte world unable to get back to their home.  The sheer power of nature is eye opening.

Kmac xx

Its the hen weekend

Date: 15 April 2010
Weather:  Nice but we have a volcanic ash overcast.  Thanks Iceland Vocano!!
Shoes:  My black lattice boots


We are now into final countdown for hen weekend number 1 this year.   My fabulous best friend is getting married very soon, and this weekend 10 of us are heading to a log cabin to have a weekend full of girly shenanigans.

But fear not blog world because I have scheduled in 2 runs during my time away.  I have a short 30 mins run planned for Friday afternoon as I arrive slightly before the other girls and I've got a 40 -60min run planned for Sat morning.  That should blast away the cobwebs from the night before!!

I can't say too much about the weekend because the hen might be reading and she cant know what we are doing... but rest assured its going to be nice and tasteful, none of this " lets dress the bride up as a giant willy" nonsence.

I ran 8km on Tuesday morning which is the longest I've run to date, may not be the best distance compared to many other runners but for me this is a huge milestone to reach.  I'm learning to be proud of what I achieve and not to benchmark myself against other people.

The Edinburgh 10k is only about 18 days away, the fabulous Fudgey is running the Dublin 10k this weekend, and she is less than 6 weeks away from her half marathon.   To think this time last year Fudgy was focusing on her own wedding plans and I had just started training with Andy at my gym - Its mind blowing the change in 365 days.

Anyway best be off to get some work done before I head off at 12pm to start hen prep!

I'll be back next week ( when I've gotten over the hangover) to blog all about it..

Kmac xx

158 days to go....

Date: 12 April 2010
Weather: SUN SUN SUN
Footwear:  Black ballet pumps

Well its 158 days until we depart on the trek to Kilimanjaro and I'm starting to get scared, excited, worried and anxious.   The enormity of the task ahead has finally hit me, the training, the altitude, the distance from home and the very real chance that I *might* not make it to the top.

Some quick fire facts about Kilimanjaro for you all...

• Kilimanjaro sits 19,340m above sea level - Ben Nevis is 1,343m above sea level.
• Kilmanjaro is the worlds largest freestanding mountain.
• Its lost nearly 83% of its ice caps since 1912
• In the year 2000 over 1000 reached the summit to watch the sunrise into the new Millenium.

Some quick fire facts about me...

• I've never been more than 251m above sea level before
• I only recently found out that I'm not infact Amphibious, I am actually Ambidexterous...
• I can't read maps and don't understand why a compass moves ALL THE TIME!
• I brought in the new Millenium on my backside because I'd slipped on the dance floor in the club that I was in.

So you can see there are some pretty huge challenges for me to face. 

I have my boots (yucky brown colour... but apparently Hiking doesn't DO chic), I have my gators, I know where Kilimanjaro is so I'm part way there...

I heard that bugs arn't so much of an issue the higher you go because they are all DEAD thanks to the altitude (always comforting...) and I've read a number of travel blogs that decribe the lovely effects of AMS (Acute Mountain Sickness) and the 5 star toilet facilities.

And yet I'm excited.  Yes - I have been called insane recently.

I'm not the worlds most confident person and I have self-esteem that, at times, is so low its below sea level and my recent party trick is to perform a panic attack when in the company of strangers or in stressful situations (Never underestimate the impact years of being told you're not good enough).  Kilimanjaro will be a massive achievement for me physically and mentally and I'm going to do it.  I'm doing it for me and for my charity.  Nobody else. 

But I know that I'll have people rooting for me and waiting for me to get back.  The support you are giving me is pushing me forward, I don't want to let you down!!

I'm climbing Kilimanjaro for CCLASP, an Edinburgh based charity that helps children and adolescents suffering from cancer and leukaemia & provides advice & support for parents. 

I've volunteered for CCLASP for around 2 years, ever since I moved to Edinburgh and its been so much fun.  Christmas parties, Summer picnics, X Factor trips, Stacey Stroll's, Ladies Day at the Races to name but a few events I've helped at.  But CCLASP also provide transport to and from hospital appointments, running a drop in centre, run a telephone helpline, arrange holidays, fundraisers, newsletters and the weekly clown entertainment on a Wednesday (theatre day) for those in hospital.

Please please please dig deep and donate to this wonderful and monumental charity through my justgiving site JUSTGIVING

I (and the rest of the Kili team) want to raise over £10,000 for them to help them continue the amazing work they currently do.

Kmac xxxx

April Fool!!

Date: 1st April 2010
Weather:  Crisp and cool outside (and inside)
Shoes: Black knee highs

Morning all.  Have you been fooled yet?  I've not had anything yet, but I suspect that at some point during the morning I'll get pranked!!

Its been a busy few days in Kmac land, the house move is tomorrow so I've been getting ready for that along with my 2 housemates. 

I've been getting lots of training in, and I asked for an extra PT sesison just to really give me a jolt back into hardcore training because although I'd been doing my CV I've been a little lacking on the resistance work.   So Friday saw me on the Olympic bar, bench pressing and cable pulling.  Sat saw the DOMs hit my shoulders big style, and I was at Jesus Christ rehearsals all day!!

Sat night was lovely and relaxed, had some dinner and a couple of glasses of wine... and Sunday morning I was back at JCS rehearsals.   The show opens in 28 days!!  Not long left now.

I think I did some damage to my groin the other week with my monster runs, so I  decided that on Monday am, which is usually CV day, to continue my CV but use the X-trainer.

The X-trainer and I dont really get along.  I find it a boring bit of gym equipment so tend to steer clear of it in favour of the treadmill or free weights area.  But Monday morning came along and I had to face the fear. I had to do 30 mins on the Xtrainer.... I swear it was the longest 30mins of my life!!

Had another PT session on Tuesday which was hard work, swiss ball press ups on the powerplate, assisted chin dips, weighted squats on the bosu ball  and some woodchops were the stars of the show.  Wednesday (yesterday)  wasnt so bad on the old DOMs front, I could feel that I'd worked but I wasnt walking like the tin man or anything.

Hope all is well with everyone.

Till next time (and from the new flat..!)

Kmac

I am not defined by a number

A wee emergency blog before I go and do something silly!!

I ordered a lovely dress online from Debenhams.  Size *insert your own choice of number*

I get an email today saying its ready to be picked up.... so I tootle along from work to get it.... I get it.... and tootle into the changing room. 

So far so good.

I open the pack to see my gorgeous, beautiful black dress with white edging staring back at me.

I unzip it.

It doesnt fit.  Its too big up top (damm small boobs) and far too tight at the bottom (fat legs apparently..).

So now I'm sat at work feeling a bit pants because my gorgeous dress doesnt fit me because of genetics and cup size.

ARRGGH